Why Do I?

Why do I let things go unsaid?
Why do I avoid confrontation?
Why do I bottle it all in until I explode?
Why do I even care what someone thinks?
Why do I avoid painful situations?
Why do I turn a blind eye/ear?
Why do I avoid the easy way?
Why do I expect these wounds to heal?
Why do I open myself up when I know disappointment will happen?
Why do I scream in my head but put a smile on my face?
Why do I lie about my feelings?

I don't say what's on my mind because I am afraid of the pain it will cause to not only myself but the individual I am talking with.

I avoid confrontation to avoid heartache and bad endings.

I keep it all in to prevent others from knowing that I am weak.

I care what someone thinks because I am longing to be accepted.

I avoid painful situations to avoid seeing tears.

I turn a blind eye/ear so that I don't accidently offer my opinion.

I avoid the easy way because I don't feel I deserve it.

I expect wounds to heal because I want to forget the past.

I open myself up because I long for that personal connection that used to exsist.

I quietly scream so as to not disrupt the calm.

I lie to keep the truth hidden.