Monday, February 28, 2011

Really? People Do This Crap?!

So I am all about prepping your body for labor. I am taking evening prime rose oil capsules and drinking red raspberry leaf tea, I am not however smearing Crisco on my butt. I have a "membership" to and love to read the ridiculous stuff people post. I once read a debate about what type of oil to drink to cause labor. One person truly thought that they were to drink motor oil. If people aren't smart enough to realize that is dangerous, do we really want them creating offspring?

I ran across this "trick" for labor induction today and laughed my non Crisco covered butt off.

"So I know a lot of people have been looking into and posting about homemade inductions, my OB told me about this Garden Method of Induction, I did it and the next day my water broke.
You take a bowl with Orange juice & Green Tea and then stand in it. Than you take basil leaves and crush them up in a bowl, add crisco, pepper, dried red pepper flakes, and cayenne pepper and rub it on your butt cheek alternating ever 5 minutes.

Take a shot of brown sugar and lemon juice. And sit on top of a bowl of 5 hour energy shot.
Do for 30-min intervals until contractions start. It was so amazing I am definitely doing it again for my next child."

REALLY?! I am pretty sure that smearing Crisco on your butt is only going to give you a greasy butt! Sitting on a 5 hour energy shot? Am I just supposed to place the container in the bowl or dump out the little liquid and then sit in that? Wouldn't the lovely coat of grease prevent the energy shot from properly absorbing into my butt? (These questions are all said in sarcasm on my part). I decided to read some of the comments for more giggles.

One person is freaking out because no one will tell her what brand of cayenne pepper to use. Should she go with McCormick or will the kind from the dollar store work? Really? Should you be allowed to care for a child?

Another reader commented this way: If all else fails, you can always recycle all of the ingredients over a nice pot roast in the slow cooker. Waste not, want not.

This reader and I have a similar sense of humor: MY GOD, I swear some of these are just made up to see how stupid pregnant women are haha! I'm going to make one up and spread it around to see how many people try it. Here goes: I heard if you stand on your toilet backwards for an hour while sucking on a tootsie pop and then drive to a mountain top and blow bubbles for 20 minutes it will put you into labor. Let's all try it!!!!!

As impatient as I am to meet my daughter, I know that she will come out when she is good and ready. TJ waited till 42 weeks to show up simply because he was warm and toasty and didn't want to come out. I know not to rush nature, but I also know how hard it can be to sit and wait. I also know that a good way to induce labor is the same thing that caused the pregnancy in the first place. I am going to print out this "natural" method and show it to my mid-wife though. I bet she could use a good laugh.

Let The Count Down Begin

It's the last day of February, finally! For being a short month, this month took forever to get through! As I sit here typing this, with my eyes closed (TJ had the flu all weekend so we are all tired), I can't help but run through the mental list of things that have yet to be accomplished. I know that the necessary ones (get car seat out of attic, move cradle into bedroom) will take all of 10 minutes to accomplish, but I can't help by panic a little. I have three different due dates: March 20, 22, and 26th. I can't help but hope she comes early.

Ayron and his dad spent most of the past week (and the weekend) working on our bathroom and Ella's room. We finally have tile up around the new tub and can seal the tile tomorrow, then put the trim molding back up and then I can finally have my bathroom back! Ella's room has the paneling ripped off, the glue sanded down, 2 skim coats, and the trim ripped off. Ayron is going to sand and prime today and Tom is going to lace the ceiling. Then we can paint!

Ayron and I keep having these dreams that Ella shows up early. That would be fine with me! Heck, I threatened my mid-wife and said, "If I go so much as 2 days past my due date I am having my friend and mom do a c-section on my kitchen table!" I went 42 weeks with TJ and do not want to do that again! Stephanie (the mid wife) says she thinks that Ella is smaller than TJ was at this point, but I beg to differ! I am ready for her to be here. In fact, I am silently praying that the false labor I am having right now leads to REAL labor!

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Boys With Long Hair

Saturday morning Taylor and I went with Ayron to get his hair cut. We sat at a station next to the one being occupied by Ayron. A lady who was getting a pedicure asked me if we were there for TJ's for hair cut. I polite said, "No. He's had haircuts before, but we like his hair long." She looked at me like I had just admitted to beating my child.

Why is it such a big deal for little boys to have long hair?! This lady looked so appalled. You could tell she was thinking, "Well that is just irresponsible parenting." So my son has long hair, WHO CARES?! People always comment on how long his hair has gotten. Someone said, "You're going to get it cut before the baby comes right?" Why? Were they afraid I was going to get my 3 year old son confused with my newborn daughter?! Why do people care so much about my son's hair?!

We like TJ's hair long. Frankly, he looks silly with it short. We've tried it. It just doesn't look right on him. So we have decided to keep it long. He knows what a hair cut is and he often pretends to give us hair cuts. If you ask him if he wants his hair cut he will simply tell you, "No. My hair stays long." So I have let my 3 year old decide to have long hair. So sue me!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

I Still Believe

I got some upsetting news yesterday. A family member has stage 4 cancer. I felt my heart break. This person has been through two other types of cancer and survived. I felt like screaming at God, "HASN'T SHE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH?!" She has 5 children and she is an amazing person. She helped her mother in law through a battle with cancer only to discover she had cancer.

It breaks my heart to know that she is so young (37, I think) and has managed to survive so much, and now this. She has decided to try one last round of treatment. We are praying, but the realist in me knows the odds.

I was cleaning my office this morning and thinking about her and just praying out loud. Well, basically I was yelling at God. I am wondering what it is He wants us to learn from this. I'm finding it hard to see the light at the end of this tunnel because I know the odds.

I decided to turn on my iPod and the first song that it played was "I Still Believe" by Jeremy Camp. I cried through that song and almost had myself settled down and then "When I Get Where I'm Going" by Brad Paisley and Dolly Parton started playing. I lost it again.

The first time I heard "When I Get Where I'm Going" was the evening after Ayron's Aunt Cathy's (the mother in law of our now sick family member) funeral viewing. The song touched me so much that for Christmas that year I made a framed picture of Cathy with the lyrics of the song surrounding the picture. I know He is trying to comfort me through these songs, but frankly, I am still just confused and hurt. I wonder what the future holds for her family, her children, her husband. They have all been through so much and now this. I am reminded of a church sign I saw on the way to work today. It read, "Having faith is not hoping He will, it is KNOWING He will." I know He will take care of everything, but it is still hard to see someone struggle so much.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Parenting Tips

Everyone does this thing called "parenting" differently. I say, to each their own. I came across an article by Alice Bradley (REDBOOK) on yahoo today and it cracked me up! Here it is:

I have nothing against friends and family offering advice when you come to them with a dilemma. It's the people who pipe up, unbidden, because they see you with a child and assume you have no idea what you're doing. Too often these people are elderly great-aunts. Fortunately those ladies are afraid of the Internet, so I can rail against them and they'll be none the wiser! Thanks, ladies.

1. "Sleep now, because once that baby comes you'll never sleep again." Technically this is a pregnancy tip, of course, but I'm shoving it in here anyway. Yes, Great-Aunt Hildy, I will sleep throughout my entire third trimester. Because I am part bear.

2. "Sleep when the baby sleeps." Everyone gives you this one — annoying relatives, pediatricians, the cashier at the drugstore where you were buying newborn diapers. Are these people all robots, capable of instantly dropping off to sleep whenever their child is unconscious? Do they not have other things to do, like bathe, or simply relish the rare moments of silence you get when you have an infant?

3. "I think your baby's hungry." Whether you're nursing or bottle-feeding, everyone assumes you don't know how to feed your child. And every time your child cries, whines, grimaces, or squirms, they are going to assume you are starving your poor baby and you need reminders to feed it. Lest you forget! This advice is especially maddening when they turn out to be correct.

4. "Relish every moment of your baby's first years, because they'll be grown before you know it." You mean, time only moves forward? I had no idea! I thought we'd be like this forever and ever! This sort of advice, obvious and innocuous as it seems, always put me on the defensive, as if I had just been carrying my baby under my arm like a football, muttering, "Grow up already, why don't you. Just GROW UP."

5. "I hope you're sleep training that child. Do you WANT him to be spoiled?" Oh, distant relative/person whose aisle I shared at the supermarket, I'm so glad you know exactly my child needs. And that you know, from your years of scientific research, that any child not allowed to cry it out will be a horrible waste of flesh! (See #6 for this parenting tip's counterpart.)

6. "I hope you're not doing that 'crying it out' thing. It's so barbaric. Enjoy your baby all through the night!" Again, kudos to you, whoever you are, for knowing what's best for our unique family situation! I will be calling you at 4 a.m., so you can enjoy our baby as well.

7. "Why are you bringing your child outside when it's so cold out?" It never ceased to amaze me that, no matter what my child's age, total strangers will express alarm and revulsion that I dared expose him to the elements. "And WHY ISN'T BE WEARING MITTENS? He's going to get consumption!"

8. "Your child isn't really sad/angry/injured. He's just manipulating you." There's no doubt that children can push our buttons as if they've had professional training in it, but the notion that my kid's authentic feelings are in fact manufactured to elicit a reaction really chaps my hide. If that were always true, he'd be a pint-sized sociopath. I'm pretty sure that's not the case.

9. "Schools are just glorified prisons. If you loved your child, you'd homeschool." Oh, if only I loved my child enough to abandon my livelihood, tear him away from the community he so enjoys, separate him from the professionals who have dedicated their careers to childhood education, and forced him to stay home all day with me, where we'd be at each other's throats for hours! If only! Please note: I am not opposed to homeschooling, at all — in fact I wish it would work for us, but it would not.

10. "If I were you, I'd just—" OH NO YOU DON'T. I know where this is going. Listen, unnamed distant acquaintance who last parented in the 19th century (it's true — I often get my unwanted advice from ghosts) you don't know diddly about my kid, and our relationship, and what works for us.

Well! That felt good. What did I miss? What parenting advice could you do without, forever? Speak now!

Teacher's Who Blog

I am a teacher. I am teacher who blogs. I try to be really careful about what I post. It can be therapeutic to blog. I don't use names, or give enough details about one person so that they can be identified. I am not your normal teacher. I deal with a stressful group of students (if you don't know what I do, see below). The ones that no one else can get through to, or the ones that no one wants to bother trying to get through to. I love them though. I view them as simply misunderstood. If you find out who they are as a person (and not just as a student), then BAM, usually they will open up and you can help them get back on track.

So as a teacher who blogs, this article intrigued me. She's right people. Students are becoming more and more unmotivated and lazy. They have been handed everything and now expect the teachers to just hand over perfect grades. That's not how I operate as a teacher. You have to prove to me you know the stuff. I don't care if you choose to prove your knowledge to me through a test, project, or just conversation, but prove it!

I liked her comment about how kids want everything now, they wanted it yesterday. When did students become so impatient? I think this has been a shift in society as a whole and not just in students. With today's technology we are able to gain stuff (information, goods, contact) within seconds. We are able to buy unlimited number of things on line. We can talk to friends and family who are half way around the world after only a few simple clicks. So who is to blame for the growing lack of patience? It is society's fault? The parents? A combination?

It bugs me that this teacher was simply venting and now she is being punished. She did not use her name, nor did she mention the school. The blog was simply for her friends and family to read. No one bothered to praise her for her positive comments, but the minute she calls her students out about their lack of effort, motivation, etc. people get upset. Instead of getting upset at the person who blew the whistle, why not look at the students who caused the whistle to be blown in the first place?!

Her comment about parents trying to be more of their child's friend than their parent is true! Your child(ren) have friends. What they need is someone to create and enforce rules and boundaries. Believe it or not, kids who have boundaries feel safe and loved. So if you truly love your child, stop trying to be their best friend and start trying to be their parent!

I blog because it's therapeutic. I will keep blogging. Heck, if/when the time comes that I am in a public school, I will probably start a blog for each of my classes. I can post the homework, classroom topics, discussion questions, etc. So I am a teacher. I am teacher who blogs. Get over it.

**I run a school for juvenile "delinquents" (I hate that term, I like to call them the misunderstood). I get students who are suspended or expelled from local schools (for various reasons ranging from truancy, to fighting, to bringing weapons/drugs to school). I am often the last stop before placement (detention centers or boys/girls school). If we can't help them turn their lives around and get back on track, the judge will have them placed. We are often the first stop out of placement as well. It gives the students time to adjust to being home before throwing them back into the craziness of public school. I work with 6th through 12th graders on any subject. I LOVE MY JOB! I really do!

Monday, February 14, 2011


Nesting SUCKS! I can't seem to just be happy with a clean house. I spent yesterday morning organizing my baking pans cupboard, the mixing bowls cupboard, and the Tupperware drawer. I don't know why I bothered because I know that in two days they will be back to chaos.

I got a bur up my rear yesterday and decided we needed to move TJ into a big boy bed (twin sized) right then. We went to the store, let him pick out some sheets, came home and made the swap. TJ seemed excited at first, but his resistance to sleep last night may have been a sign. He didn't fall asleep till after 11. Ayron and I both spent time in the bed with him before we gave up and just left him in his room.

I got a new dryer on Thursday, so that was a nice change. It is not new, but new to us and dang that sucker can put out some heat! After not having a dryer for a week I actually had fun doing laundry all weekend....sick right?

Right now my bathroom is being torn apart. A little over a year ago we had the flood remodel of 2009. We finally got the walls the color we wanted, the vanity painted, etc. Now it is being torn into again. We are finally able to replace the shower with a real tub! The lady we bought the house from 4 years ago was an elderly lady who had one of the shower conversion things done so that she didn't have a high edge to step over. Ayron loves the shower because it has a bench seat built into the back wall. I miss having a tub. We finally saved up enough money (seems like every time we got close to having the money something else would break and our money would be diverted) and the tub was ordered. The shower is getting ripped out today and the tub is being installed. I can't wait to crack out the Mr. Bubble and take a bath tonight!

I know my life is headed for a lot of changes so why am I in such a hurry to make a bunch of changes right now? I have the urge to start tearing into the nursery (it has some ugly painted wood paneling that needs to be ripped down). I know these projects take time, but I want them done NOW! I can't help it. It's like I think the sooner I get all the stuff done, the sooner Ella will be here. Why can't I just relax and enjoy what little time I have left with just one kiddo?

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

What Happened to Books and Cursive Writing

I am not against technology. I have an e-reader, I'm "hip" like that. But I also appreciate the beauty of a nicely bound book.

A local school has just announced that instead of getting textbooks and workbooks, the school is going to invest in iPads for each student. They admitted they haven't fully thought through the process yet. Who will be responsible if one breaks? What if a student loses one? Who can take them home versus who can't? What if the student doesn't have Internet at home and their iPad homework requires it? Seems to me they should have figured all that out before they announced to the local radio and television station their plans.

If I were a parent of a kindergartner, I would ask that the school NOT give my child the iPad. I don't want to be financially responsible for that! I think it is one thing if each classroom has X iPads that are used during the day. Those can be "checked out" and accounted for before the students leave.

With all this technology, I have to wonder what things TJ and Ella will miss out on because they were born in 2008 and 2011. I know they won't be taught cursive. Most schools have done away with that. Frankly, I see that as silly. A local radio station did a call in about it and one gentleman had a good point. If we don't teach our kids cursive, how are they going to learn to actually sign their names on important documents? I enrolled a student on Monday who didn't know how to sign his name. He is 15 years old and has no clue how to write cursive letters!

I know we are pushing our kids to learn more at an early age, but without actual books how are they going to be able to truly enjoy reading? Without cursive writing how will they learn to sign their names? It seems like we are in such a rush to teach all we can at an early age that some basic things/pleasures are being tossed aside. I remember learning how to count to 100 in kindergarten, now they expect your child to be able to do that before kindergarten. Things I don't remember learning till second grade are now taught in preschool! Why are we in such a hurry to make our kids grow up at an early age?

Tuesday, February 08, 2011

Funeral Schmunearl

I went to a funeral viewing last evening and was reminded of how much I dislike funeral homes. I think it's a great business to go into because people will always need those services, but I just don't like them. Never have, never will.

On the way home Ayron and I got to talking about funerals and all that goes with it. I know that my mom wants cremated and I know where her ashes are to go. I know my dad used to joke around about having a clear topped casket that had a keg attached at the end. I know my sister wants a casket made by some priest group (can't remember where) and a GIANT batch of perfection salad. I have finally decided what I want......NOT A FUNERAL! I want a party. Cremate me, put me in a jar and place me next to the punch bowl. I have no clue where I want my ashes spread, but all I know is, no stuffy funeral homes please!

Ayron and I got to talking about funerals and agreed that the funniest funeral every was my grandfathers. Grandpa Eaton was an avid motorcycle guy. He passed away shortly before Thanksgiving in 2001. Normally, motorcycle riders winterize their bikes beginning of November. All of his friends de-winterized their bikes and rode them to the funeral. I have never seen so many leather clad people wearing chaps in one location before. It was AWESOME! To the people who were shocked to see such a sight, I say, you obviously didn't know Grandpa because he I know he LOVED it. We had a motorcycle lead procession to the cemetery and I remember we all refused to get out of the car until there was a break in the Purdue vs. Michigan State football game. To the people who found this offensive, I again say, you obviously didn't know my grandpa. Now that was a funeral.

So while I don't know where I want my ashes spread, I know that I want a party. None of those posters full of old photographs. No crying or Kleenex. Just a big old party full of chocolate, punch, and some chex mix!