How Long?

How long does it take for a life to change? 1 day? 1 hour? 1 week? 1 minute?



We are coming up on the second anniversary of the accident that changed everything. Here the blog I posted two years ago.

We, Nikki and I, were talking about the accident last night. The anniversary is proudly written on the family calendar. It marks a change in not only her life, but our family's life. We are stronger now. Not a week goes by that I don't see my nieces or in-laws. That month of living in a hospital waiting room was rough, but it did bring us closer together. It also humbled Phil. He was forced to ask for help and he realized he didn't have to go through this alone.

I can still remember the first time I saw her after the accident. They lead me back to the Neuro ICU. They told me, "She won't look like herself. She won't respond to you, but that doesn't mean she can't hear you. Talk to her, tell her who you are, hold her hand, etc." I walked into the room and about lost it. I swore I wouldn't let her hear me cry. They had the movie Frosty playing on her TV. You know, the old movie version that is horrible, but that gets played a million times around the holidays. She loves that movie. When Phil saw it on the tv, we left the tv on. Phil stepped out of the room to take a phone call and I walked over to her right side and took her hand. I was talking to her and I told her, "If you can hear me, squeeze my hand." Those two seconds were the longest of my life. Suddenly her hand grabbed mine so tight I jumped. Her legs started moving. She was panicking. They were still adjusting her meds to keep her in a "mini" induced coma, but alert enough to respond (if she could) when asked. I got Phil's attention. He waved me off (I don't think he realized what was going on and he was on the phone). I couldn't get her to calm down. Finally, Phil came in, took her other hand and she instantly calmed down. You can't tell me that people in comas don't hear, I think they do. Of course she doesn't remember any of this. She was in the hospital for exactly a month, but she only remembers the last couple of days. Thank God that she is perfectly healthy, actually she has better eyesight since the accident. The only difference is a cool scar on his thigh and her speech is still just a bit off. She sounds like someone who has had one to many to drink. But if having her voice be different means we can keep her, then we'll take it.

I have to say that I hate driving. It makes me nervous. I hate accidents even more. I have lost a grandfather to a car accident (he died long before I was born), a high school friend, and Ayron's mother's first husband was killed in a crash. It makes me nervous.

I was driving to work this morning thinking about the accident and Ayron called to say that he will be going to Wisconsin (or was it Minnesota??) this weekend to meet with a gentleman that wants to use KRUSE to auction some cars and car parts. I know if they drive that I will be a wreck. Pray for sanity!