Thursday, May 08, 2008

A Moment Alone

I have a rare moment alone this morning. I am at work and enjoying the peace and quiet of my office. At the present moment there are no screaming/quarreling students, no police sirens, no dogs barking, no babies crying, but there is a lawn mower somewhere in the distance. These alone moments are few and far between. They allow me the chance to think about how life has changed in the past two months. The obvious changes and the not so obvious changes.

I still find it hard to believe that I am a parent. I look at my child in awe knowing that Ayron and I created him with His help of course. I am reminded of the seemingly long road we took to conceive and I am reminded that others are still on that road. My heart aches for them. I want them to know/experience the feelings/emotions I do every time I look at Taylor. I pray for their success (funny way of putting it) but also pray that His timing be done.

Ayron and I have grown closer through these past weeks. It does take a village (or at least a very willing extended family) to raise a child. My heart goes out to all the single parents. I don't know how you did/do it. You are amazing to me. Ayron and I are pretty good about taking turns when it comes to getting up at night or washing/filling the bottles. It is fun to sit and watch Ayron play with Taylor. The other night I caught a rare glimpse of my mother-in-law and I smiled. We were at Pizza Hut and Ayron was feeding Taylor while sitting across the table from his mom. Ayron was babbling to Taylor and I caught Jo watching her son feed his son. I could see the pride ooze from her.

Our families have grown as well. It's not a secret that in the past Jo and I didn't exactly see eye to eye. While never verbally had it out, those issues are resolved now and I am grateful for her help. It is funny to watch Ayron's brother (the big tough firefighter) melt when he sees Taylor. Or to walk into the living room and see Uncle Phil asleep in the recliner with Taylor curled up like a turtle on his chest. My parents can now be in the same room without either one of them tearing up over the bitter past. They can sit and watch each other in awe while holding their grandchild.

The power of a baby is amazing. They can turn the grumpiest old man into a babbling fool. They can soften the heart of a hardened woman. They can help clear the mind of the confused. I have taken Taylor to mom's work (a senior living facility) and seen all of this. They can make you think about the awesome power of our Lord.

Just thinking about what it takes to bring a child into this world. It's amazing how one sperm and on egg can create a human. It only takes nine months for that one celled baby to grow and enter this world. I don't know who people can think about that process or look at a baby and not believe in God. His power and ability leave me dumbstruck.

Ok, I'm done rambling for now. It's amazing how when I was home for 6 weeks without easily accessible Internet I thought of several thought provoking blog topics, but now that I'm back at work and have the Internet at my fingertips I forget them all.

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