How do I...

leave work at work? I am discovering, well I guess I always knew, how hard it is to leave work at work. I work with troubled kids, I also teach, I also coordinate for the after school program. These students have such complicated and horrible home lives that it tends to haunt me. They bring these problems with them, who can blame them, to school and then they struggle to stay on task. I try to do everything possible to give these kids the help they need. I am finding that I wear many hats. I'm a mother, sister, counselor, teacher, coordinator, friend, cook, and boss all at work. It's very hard to leave those things at the door when I leave every afternoon. I know that it's not healthy to carry them home with me. It's not healthy physically, emotionally, or socially. I know that my husband is sick of hearing about everything that happened, but I guess I hope that by telling someone everything that I hear (minus names, confidentiality is key) I can get some insight that I didn't have while at work. My heart aches for these kids! Hopefully I can learn how to balance work with home. Is this a normal dichotomy that people face? Is it something that I should get used to? I sure hope not, because I know all of the worrying I do for these students is causing my constant slight cold and migraines. I guess any wisdom or previous experiences people could share would be helpful to me right now.

My ABC'S

My ABC's
A - Age: 23 (I'm old!)
B - Birthday: July 23
C - Car: Ford Taurus
D - Dogs or Cats: dogs
E - Eggnog: Um...YUCK!
F - Favorite color: Blue
G - Gummy Bears or Worm: worms
H - Happy: Heck yeah! We get to move soon!!
I - Ice Cream: I like to many different kinds to narrow it down to just one
J - Job: Stressful but well worth it
K - Kindergarten: The best 5 years of my life!
L - Longest Car Ride: I can remember?? Oklahoma.
M - Most missed memory: The excitement of getting ready for a date
N - Number of Siblings: 1, and her name starts with a "N" what a coinkidink!
O - One wish: No child should lack the love of a parent
P - Piercings: Yes, but I'm not telling... Oh come on, get your head out of the gutter, it's my ears!
Q - Question: Why did/does God allow stupid people to breed?
R - Reason to smile: My hubby and success of my students
S - Song: There's a Hippo in my Bathtub
T - Time you woke up: 6:00, but the time I actually got out of bed was 6:45
U - Underwear: wearing them thank you very much!
V - Vegetable you hate: brussel sprouts
W- Where are you going to travel next: Home to my OWN home
X - mas- a pitiful slang term for CHRISTmas
Y - Year it is now: 2006
Z - Zoo Animal: Zebra

Help!!

Ok, so if you're an avid reader of my blog (well first, you should probably get a life, because I'm not sure that I'm all that interesting) you know that I was promoted and I am now the coordinator/head of a non profit youth improvement program. Our goal is to not only help these kids get the guidance and instruction they are missing at home, but teach them how to interact with the public. I would like to bring the public into the program, but also get the kids out into the public. We are arranging for the local ATA to come in and give lessons, and we are also arranging for them to be able to use the local college's weight room and learn how to properly lift weights. We would like to have them do a service project, but I am not sure what. If you can think of an easy service project that my students could do, that would be greatly appreciated. Also, if you know of anyone who is willing to come into our program and teach them a skill or anyone who has lead an interesting life and could be considered a healthy role model, could you please let me know. I have a character artist coming in this week because the students I have know are extremely interested in art.

Blog Title

As I was reading my own blog today, yeah I know I'm pathetic, we all know, so let's move on. Anyway! I realized that my title could be confusing to most people. Here is the reader's digest version of how that nickname came to be.

I used to be a counselor at a camp for mental retarded adults, Camp Re-Yo-Ad. One year we had a backwards day. We all wore name tags with our new name. Mine is Amrac (hense the web address). A camper, who was learning to read, struggled all day to read my name tag. By the time dinner rolled around, he got it. He said, "Amrac, like Amtrack, like the Amtrack Train." Since then, I have been known as Amtrack by several close friends."

So there you have it, nothing big, no funny story on how it came to be. It's not exactly all that original, but it has stuck.

Friday Night Funnies Part II

If you haven't read "Friday Night Funnies" go back and read that post before reading this one.

My sister met Joe this weekend and she said, "You're the infamous Joe who wears women's jeans." We told her about the question revolving around men in women's jeans. If guy wears women's jeans, are they tighter in the front and baggy in the butt? Joe had finally decided to answer the question, and here is how he came to his conclusion (Joe, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong since I wasn't there)

Joe woke up one morning and decided to wear his women's jeans. Looking mighty fine, Joe continued about his daily activities. Later in the evening, Joe decided to imitate someone (I believe it was the extremely adorable Josiah) who wears their pants halfway up their torso. Without thinking, Joe grabbed the waistband of his women's jeans, and quickly jerked them up to the middle of his torso. In the middle of completing this action, Joe discovered that yes, women's jeans are tighter in the front and can cause serious pain when worn by a male!

I hope that Joe's hastiness in pulling up his pants does not prevent him from ever being able to create little Joes. Wait, do we really want little Joe's running around??

Christmas Music

I would like to know what idiot at the FCC decided that playing Christmas music before the month of December was ok. Don't get me wrong, I like Christmas music, but come on, it's still like 60 degrees outside. Oh, and those stations that started playing Christmas music before Thanksgiving...they should lose their broadcasting license, if there is such a thing.

I did notice an odd phenomenon though. While my sister and I despise Christmas in the month of November (it's ok if it's played in December) we discovered the powerful effect it has on the human body. We had the radio on while we were painting and working on the house this weekend (BIG THANKS goes out to my sister for her help!) and while we immediately said "Blech" every time a Christmas song came on, we discovered that halfway through the song, both of us were singing it. Our mind screamed, "NO!!!" but our bodies did not obey. I think the government is using the music to control us? HeHeHe...wait, I work for the government.

House Update

This weekend we managed to get a lot done on the house! Our bedroom is painted, except for the trim, and the hallway/living room/one dining room wall was first coated. We are giving it a second coat tonight. I managed to wash out the cupboards and put some dishes away. It is nice to have a house, I just wish we could sleep there! Our goal is to move small things throughout the week and then move the big objects on Saturday. It's exciting!

Black Friday

So I decided to do what millions of other idiots do the day after turkey day. I shopped at Wal-Mart. Not once, oh no, that would be too typical. I went TWICE! Granted, Natalee and I didn't stand in line and beat anyone up over one of those silly 6-11am deals. Our first trip was around 9:30, and it wasn't bad! We got the one deal we went after, the vacuum. We came back about an hour and a half later to get some spirits for the weekend. I was given my Christmas present by my sister this weekend too! She bought Ayron and I our microwave from Home Depot. It will be delivered to our house either Tuesday or Wednesday. Yeah! Now I can cook food, yes I have a stove, but the stove needs to major cleaning!!

Christian Rap (?)

So I was sitting at my desk this morning, listening to "WOW Worship 2001" and I think I stumbled upon the funniest version of Christian rap. My cd started to skipping during the song "Shout to the North." This is what the corus sounded like.

Sh..shout to the north north north
and the Sou sout south
Sing sing sing to the East and the wes west
Je je jesus is saviour to all all all
Lord of heaven ven and earth earth

It was just the laugh I needed to wake up and get focused on my work!

Remodel Day #1

Well, last night was crazy! We spent the evening taping (so we can paint the ceilings) the entire house, patching some cracks, and hanging plastic. We took down the curtains in the big front window so the whole neighborhood could see my crazy family. They probably are dreading the day we actually move in! There were 7 adults and 3 kids there. The sheriff came over. No, not because of the 10 people, just to introduce himself. We live right across the street from him. Which makes me feel secure. We did have a freak out though. We discovered that when you open the blinds on the sliding door that leads to the 4-seasons room and a car is driving down the alley a block over, it looks like they are driving right into our backyard! Hopefully when I get off work, the ceilings will be primed and sprayed and I can help lay it down. For those of you with minimal construction knowledge, we are lacing the ceilings. You spray mud onto the ceilings, let it start to hand down and dry, then take a trowel and smooth it out. So here is my timeline if all goes well.

Tuesday (that's today!): Prime and lace the ceilings
Wednesday: Paint ceilings
Thursday: Eat turkey and sleep
Friday: paint bedroom and start painting hallway and living room
Saturday: finish painting
Sunday: eat more turkey; maybe move just enough so we can spend our first night in the house.

I will admit that I am liking the learning process I am under going. I was learning about wiring last night, how to mix the mud to fill cracks, tape, etc. I liked it...call me crazy, but I did.

Why Cats Shouldn't Be Left Alone!!

This is what happens when you leave your cat at home alone!

No Cats were harmed in during the process!

Closing is DONE!

Well, it is official. I am now a home owner! We closed this morning at 8:15 and were even given a nice check! The money went immediately into the bank, except for $95. Did you know that in order to change the utilities over to a new name, you have to give the city $95? Well, I guess it's worth having heat and electricity, but still.....$95!

Well, it's my first day at "Coordinator" so I better start coordinating.

Good Luck!

I just wanted to take a moment to publicly wish Todd and Bethany "Good Luck" today. They'll know what I mean, so don't worry if you're lost!

Have I become addicted?

After laying in bed for a couple of hours last night, trying to get my brain to shut off, I began to wonder. Have I become addicted to blogging? I'm not talking a full blown addiction and I DO NOT mean to lighten the severity of an addiction, I understand how serious they can be. But I realized a change in my behavior over the past week. When I arrive at work, I no long check my e-mail first, I check everyone's blog. I find myself disappointed if a new post is not made by at least one person. I think to myself, "that would make a good blog." I even talked to a blog consultant last night. Did you know they have those and that they are very expensive? My consult was free because, well, my consultant loves me (hahaha). No, but seriously consultants makes mucho money! I was told that my blog could be very successful and that I have a great voice running throughout my blog. I didn't know I had a "voice" in my blog. Heck, I didn't even know people other than my family members read it until this week, and I still have no clue how many people do, and frankly, I don't care. I blog as a way of journaling. It's therapeutic for me. But I'll admit it was cool to here a blog consultant compliment my blog. I find the whole thing hilarious. I started the whole blogging thing just to have a spot to "vent" and now it has managed to connect me with people that I wouldn't normally connect with on a daily basis. My "addiction" doesn't disrupt my life, I still function quite well in society, I can get my work done, and I can stop any time I want to, I can, I swear, really, ok, I'm stopping now...see me stop....really, I'm serious this time.

Friday Night Follies

We decided to celebrate my "promotion" last night by hanging out with a group of people at Joe's apartment. Turns out, we were the only ones who showed (Joe did too of course). So we talked and ate dinner. Without getting too deep, we learned that we had both (Joe and I) been deceived in the past by one person. It was interesting to learn the truth from each other. But on to the funny part. There are a few lines from last night's long conversation. While you may not find it funny, we sure as heck did.

...Joe frantically reached for the cookie and clutched it to his bosom. He could only hope avoided the wrath of the angry hand.

...three people, three bottles of bubbly (non-alcoholic of course), three plastic champagne glasses, three bellies full of bad Chinese food, three VERY gassy individuals.

...it involved a tree, a raccoon, and a package of fig newtons. I'd tell you the rest, but I'd I would have to kill you.

Ok, so reading them now, they aren't as funny, but to me they are funny and frankly that is all that matters! Oh, the pictures I am supposed to be receiving from last night will be hilarious!!!

CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES!!!

It's time to celebrate and have a good time!!! I was given a promotion today! I am not only the teacher of the Steuben County Youth Improvement Day program, but the coordinator for both the Youth Improvement Day and After School Program! More money, better hours, better lap top, year round work!! I am so excited!! It means more responsibility, but I'm ready for it!!!! I am so excited! My first really big job using my degree!!!!

Closing on Monday

Ok, so it's final! We are closing Monday morning. Here is our latest issue. The "tub" in our new house is not really a tub, but a shower with a seat for an elderly person. There is only about a 3 inch lip on the bottom of the "tub" so we will need to put in shower doors. The problem is, the tallest I can find shower doors is 69inches. Sounds fine and dandy for a majority of the population, but have you met my husband? So I think I'm going to contact Lowes and see how much it will cost to specially order taller doors. I guess we could buy the the 69inch tall door and hang a shower curtain up higher. Would that look tacky? Hey wait, since when do I care if it looks tacky, as long as my bathrooms is getting flooded!

Songs for my Sister

These songs are for my sister, in hopes of cheering her up. Heck, we could all use a little cheering up!

Stand
You feel like a candle in a hurricane
Just like a picture with a broken frame
Alone and helpless
Like you've lost your fight
But you'll be alright

Cause when push comes to shove
You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up
Decide you've had enough
You get mad you get strong
Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand, Then you stand

Life's like a novel
With the end ripped out
The edge of a canyon
With only one way down
Take what you're given before its gone
Start holding on, keep holding on

Cause when push comes to shove

You taste what you're made of

You might bend, till you break

Cause its all you can take

On your knees you look up

Decide you've had enough

You get mad you get strong

Wipe your hands shake it off

Then you Stand

Everytime you get up
And get back in the race
One more small piece of you
Starts to fall into place
Ooohhh

Or there is the ever popular.....

Here's a little song I wrote

You might want to sing it note for note

Don't worry, be happy

In every life we have some trouble

But when you worry you make it double

Don't worry, be happy

Don't worry, be happy now

Fed Up

I have decided that I am fed up with the traditional form of education. It obviously doesn't work for some students. Those students get sent to me because they are "trouble makers." Case and point. I had court today, and enrolled a new student to begin my program tomorrow. He is 13 and highly intelligent. He gets into trouble because he is bored. He admitted it. Why is the school system not challenging these students? I often wonder if the school, as a whole, would produce better students if everyone was allowed to work at their own pace. How many "troubled" students would graduate early because they were allowed to work ahead? I don't believe my students are bad, they are not challenged enough, so they challenge. I understand the difficulty teachers face. Up to seven classes a day, with at least 25 students per class, that adds up (175 to be exact). I've been there, done the public school thing. I still don't find it hard. Assign group projects. Give several different choice to choose from. Let the students personalize their education. It takes extra time, I know it does, I've done it. But I feel the reward is better, students are happier, and happier students most often leads to better grades and more confidence. If only states would allocate more money to education instead of selling the toll road, only to build a new one around the state capital. What about our failing students and crappy schools?

Sad

Well, Adam just tested a piece of equipment and found it dead. I have a feeling that the kid I am soon to test will be just as dead as that 20 year old piece of equipment, and he is only in his first year of "teen hood." I have court in less than an hour for an emergency case. While I cannot go into details, I can say that he is a very young minor with severe issues. It is sad to realize how many "dead" young people there are in the world. They can be dead to many things, family, friends, school, faith, etc. This student, I'm afraid, is dead to all of those things. When did it become acceptable to give up on these students? I know that I haven't, but I'm only one person. The student has even given up on himself. How am I suppsed to hook up the AED paddles of life when the student keeps wiping up the jelly (to prevent burns). I could go ahead and "shock him" (send him to lock up) without the jelly, but all that is going to do is burn him. He'll come back deader (I know, I know, grammar) than he was. The school has already written him off until at least next semester, and for good reason, but it's still sad. Hopefully I can find a spark of life in this kid, and use my AED (Alternative Education Documents??) to bring him back to life.

I'm a great aunt!

Recently my nieces have discovered 4-H, and more importantly, my sister-in-law, is discovering what she missed by not being in 4-H. Long story short, they now own a small bunny farm. They started out with one bunny, and now, if my calculations are correct, they have around 15. One bunny, Kamisha, only had one bunny. But this bunny is special, it only has three legs. They don't know what happened (they traced bad genetics on both sides, or the mom could have accidentally chewed it off when trying to move the baby) but either way, my three nieces have become attached to the tripod bunny. The other bunny, I can't remember her name, had 5 bunnies, one of them being orange, which is apparently rare and something special. We are going over tonight to meet our new great nieces and nephews. While I laughed to myself (internally of course) when this whole bunny breeding farm started, I am now seeing how it has brought the whole family together. Even our three year old niece has duties when it comes to the bunnies. Although, brand new baby bunnies confuse her. After the first batch of five healthy bunnies were born, she was taken out to the garage to see them. After being lifted up to see the hairless and pink bunnies, she was disappointed. Her dad finally asked her, "M, what is wrong?" She replied, "Daddy, those ain't bunnies, those are piggies. They ain't got no hair!" My sister-in-law took out a photo from when M was born and said, "See when you were born, you didn't have any hair either." Even though those new bunnies don't fit into her knowledge of what bunnies are, she still loves them. She is still confused, but watching the bunnies grow on a daily basis is starting to help her. Sometimes I wish we could all go back to those days of innocence and exploration. When was the last time you were astounded by an animal birth? Sure, the miracle of life is always thought about during a human birth, but look at life through the eyes of a child. Her pet bunny was just getting big, and now, she has five more bunnies she gets to help care for. She doesn't care if their bunnies or pigs, shes just proud that she gets to help. We should all be so lucky and proud to help.

Unwanted Lesson

I have decided that this whole house buying process is an unwanted lesson in patience from God. Anyone who knows me, knows that I suffer from a lack of patience. I would rather take the reigns and do it myself instead of waiting for someone else. You would think that I would have an abundance of patience, considering what I do for a living (teacher juvenile delinquents) but truth be told, I think my level of patience varies on the situation. I have a ton of patience when it comes to work and friends, but when it comes to family and God, I seem to lack. It's sad to realize that I lack patience in my daily dealings with God. He is the one person I should be the most patient with. All things happen according to His timing, not mine. I know that, yet I don't. Why am I trying to rush the whole moving thing?

The whole moving thing scares me. Yep, I'm a 23 year old chicken. I'll work with the roughest of the rough when it comes to work, but I'm terrified of moving. I guess it's because I view this thing as a giant step into adulthood. Sure, I've done the marriage thing, earned a college degree, got my first job with my degree, but a house...yikes. I guess I've grown comfortable with where we are at now. It's so secure. True, living with the in-laws isn't always a walk on the beach, but it does hold less stresses than owning your own home.

A called in the middle of my blog session to tell me that he still hasn't been able to get a straight answer from anyone about closing. It's frustrating, but I'm turning it completely over to God.

God grant me the patience to get through this situation and still have sanity afterwards. I know that all things happen according to Your timing, so I pray that Your will be done.

Unavoidable Disappointment

They say that God works in mysterious ways, and I agree. It's just that sometimes I wish he wasn't so mysterious. Then I wonder, is he being mysterious or are my ears turned off to what he is trying to tell me? We were supposed to close on our house tonight. A called me this morning and told me that some paperwork that is neccessary for closing has yet to be sent back to our mortgage person. It's nothing that we could have changed, it's nothing that our mortgage person could have changed. Whoever is supposed to fill a certain paper out, did not get that form back to our mortgage company in time. Long story short, we aren't closing tonight. It seems that whenever I get my hopes up about anything, it all comes crashing down on my head. This is why I try not to get overly excited about anything. So, I woke up feeling yicky (feverish, sore throat, huge tonsils) and now I really feel icky.

We did go to Home Depot last night and get some supplies for the house, $133 in supplies to be exact. We had to get three big tubs of mud, 1 bag of joint compound, 2 gallons of primer, 2 rolls of blue painting tape, a contractors bundle of brown tape, and two boxes of painting plastic. It was not exactly my favorite shopping spree, but we did decide that we can afford new counter tops sooner than we had planned! Still, if I got to choose between shopping at Home Depot or shopping at any store in the mall, I'd choose the mall.

Stolen Post

I have recently discovered blogs written by people from my "group" at church. I will admit that while I hate to "lift" material from other people, I am an English teacher, this one was too good to pass up.

Do you ever screw up? I mean really blow it. Or do you ever see someone else who makes a major mistake or does you wrong. Poop like this causes life to get real messy real quick. I, for one, have a tendency to get really agitated at myself or others when there is a major screw-up. But why?

In the medical profession, doctors often ask patients when the last time they had a bowel movement. Sometimes they ask frequently as everyday, “Have you had a bowel movement?” What a weird question! But its one that needs answered. You see, that daily bowel movement signifies to the doctors that everything in the body is working they way it should. The bowel movement is a positive role in a patient’s recovery; poop is good.

I think we need to lighten up sometimes. When you, or someone you know screws up bigtime, its stupid to get all worked up about it. Sure it was a mistake, but you’re human so that mistake just proves that you’re still working things out; you’re still living. Instead of getting all worked up it would be better to get excited and say, “Yea! Somebody took a dump! We’re alive!” and get over it. Wipe it and be done.

This entry was lifted from www.adamdiehl.com

Friday Night Funny

We had QUEST(a group of young adults from our church get together and hang out) and it turned out to be really good. I ran into my old middle school crush and his wife. Kind of funny the similarities between him and A. They are both dark, tall, hilarious people. Strengthened a friendship with a newlywed couple in the group. Reconnected with an old friend of A's. Anyways...now on to the funny part.

A very non-dramatic (that's sarcasm for those of you who don't know me) friend of mine, J, came out of the bathroom and asked me what I thought of his pants. He is always one to be stylish and point out how good people look in certain colors, so it caught me off guard that he was asking me a question about apparel. I looked the jeans over, decided I like them, and then told him that. He gladly took the compliment and hesitated. I sensed there was more to come. When prodded, he admitted they were women's jeans. He told the hilarious story about trying them on and the funny looks from the sales lady when he asked how they looked. He was able to buy six pairs of jeans for under $100, which is very impressive. After being heckled by a couple of people (mostly his brother and sister), N (another friend from the group), looked at J with a very serious face and asked this question; "If a guy wears women's jeans, are the jeans tighter up front and bigger in the butt?" J, after a minute of contemplation answered, "Nope, they feel really good!" It's people like these that make life worth living.

Ok, so after rereading what I just wrote, I realize that it's not exactly as funny as it was in person. But I did make the comment that the whole situation was very bloggable, so now it has been blogged.

Court

I had court this morning for a student. His behavior has been unacceptable in every part of his life, and today it caught up with him. As I sat and listened to the judge, I began to feel like a kicked puppy. I was this kids last chance to straighten out and that didn't happen. I keep wondering if I missed something. Could I have done anything differently that would have changed this outcome? I know that he needs help that I cannot provide, but it still hurts to see your first student be sent away while his mother cries. I feel like I let her down. Hopefully he can get the help he needs and can get his life back on track, but I am viewing the whole thing as a failure attempt on my part.

Never being one to accept failure, my new view is hard to accept. I guess I'm just worried that it will make me look bad in the eyes of the community. I went and talked to the alternative school director about these feelings and she assures me they are natural and that the student does indeed help that no one locally can provide the help he needs. It's still a let down.

Thank God for In-Laws

Not a title most people would expect me to use, but the tables have turned. We close on our house tomorrow and I knew that money would be tight because of timing. We had to pay our first years insurance up front, and then the car payment, etc. We have enough to survive comfortably, but my father in law knew how concerned I was. I found out this weekend that my in law's are writing us a check to cover way more than the paint and mud we need. Hopefully, we can get all of the paint, mud, primer, and even some border on top of getting some shower doors. I guess they (my in law's) had been feeling guilty because money was being gifted (our of grandma's account) to various cousins for various events (mostly births) and A and I along with A's brother and sister in law, were not given any because neither N (my sister in law) or I have given birth lately. So each couple is getting a check. It is a big load off my mind. I am truly greatful and cannot wait to go to HD tonight to get paint and supplies.

Well I have court in a half an hour so I should get ready.

I made a decision

I did something last night that I hardly ever do. I made a decision concerning the makeover of our new house. After we met with DC, our insurance man, who by the way is very cool, A and I stopped at Wally World to look at a new bed-in-a-bag. We found one with similar colors to the one we currently own. We decided to go ahead and get it, thanks the to sale price. So while we were there, A made me go look at paint for the millionth time since we put an offer in on our house. I made a decision on paint! In fact, I made two! What makes it really cool is that A and I were able to agree with hardly any problems! Our bedroom will be "spring fawn" and the living room/ hallway will be dusty cannon. We could close tomorrow night, which would be really cool! We have also decided to go ahead and lace the entire ceiling, bedrooms and all. It will be a little more expensive, since we'll have to buy more plastic, but in the long run it will be easier. We will then paint the ceilings, our bedroom, living room, and hallway. I attempt to learn and help how to spray the ceilings, but I know that if I bow out gracefully and go home to pack, the ceilings will get done a lot faster. It is getting really exciting now and I think it would be really cool to take possession tomorrow and start working on the house this weekend. If we start Saturday morning, we could very easily be done with the ceilings by the evening and paint the walls and everything on Sunday and possibly Monday. It would be soooo very cool to be in my house by this time next week!

House Update

We got another house update yesterday. The air conditioning is fixed. We have our interest rate. We are finalizing insurance stuff today and tomorrow. I just can't wait to get in there. I tricked into helping me clean and organize some of our stuff last night. We had his soccer game at 5, went to dinner after that, putzed around, finally gave up and came home. I challenged him to Hot Shots Golf 3. We played a quick round, and since we tied, he had to help me organize some stuff. I managed to get some stuff organized. Nothing really packed though. I did stop this morning and got more boxes from my dad's office. I am in the mood to simplify as I pack, which isn't going well for a couple of reasons. A) I haven't really managed to pack anything, just kind of shuffle things around. B) My husband has become a pack rat. I have a fear of becoming a pack rat (apparently it's genetic and runs in my family) so I have been trying to avoid it. I am in the mood to clean and pack now, but I'm at work. Hopefully the house will be empty when I get home and I can crank up the music and get some packing done!!!

Slow Day...Again

This week has been incredibly slow.

Monday: No students (long story)
Tuesday: Sent both students home
Wednesday: Both students sick again (one at dr's, other sick with sinus infection)

There is only so much cleaning I can do. I've reorganized the filing cabinet, twice. Cleaned off both desks, three times. Changed out the bathroom door knob (with the help of A), rearranged classroom, put down new rugs, went to Meijer with boss, played about a million games of mahjong solitaire, completed several different court documents. I'm just plain bored. Of course, I forgot to grab a book to read. I could always go shred paper in my other office, but the shredder is so loud and often gets stuck...blech.

Final Inspection....

...is complete. T (my father-in-law), P (my brother-in-law), and A (my hubby) all went and completed the final inspection last night. I took the earnest money into C (our realator) this. The other real estate company started the title work yesterday. A is checking on insurance today. It looks like this is really going to happen this time. I even went and got some paint samples this morning. We will have to fix a spot in the ceiling and paint that before we move in, and also paint our bedroom, and possibly the living room. It's all very exciting and frightening at the same time. I can't imagine how freaked I'd be if we didn't have access to a construction business! P is going to build me some extra cuboard for my kitchen, so that is cool! (My mortgage broker just called and she's faxing over papers my boss needs to fill out verifying my employment.) Wow, this is all very cool!! Hopefully closing can be as soon as possible and we can spend a week painting and decorating and then the next weekend move.

Moving is another thing that scares me. We have roughly 20 rubbermaid totes out in the barn of stuff already packed and ready to move. I forget what is in most of them. But as I looked around the house last night, we still have a ton of stuff to pack!! (Just called dad, he's going to have all of the schools in the county save big boxes) We are going to use a boxtruck. A is going to use two of his employees and pay them to help us move. We are going up to my dad's this weekend to look through some of his house stuff he doesn't use anymore and see what we can use. I'm getting very excited, which will make it hard to sit still and get some work done the rest of the day. I have court next week and I need to prepare today. Blech!!

List of Stuff

So, I have decided to start a list of stuff that I will need to acumulate for our new house.

* new smoke detector/carbon monoxide detector
* new locks for all doors
* toilet paper (that one's for miamy)
* tv for living room
* silverware
* door mat
* Christmas tree ornaments
* toaster


So far my list isn't long, but I'm sure if I added all of the groceries people normally have (condiments, flour, sugar, etc) it could get pretty long. If anyone has any advice or more suggestions on how to make the moving process easier, leave me a comment.


*After reading my sisters comment, I guess I'll go shopping at the house of mom!

Happy Happy Joy Joy

We were told last night that our offer was accepted on the house we have been looking at. The offical paperwork was faxed to our realator this morning and T, my father-in-law, is doing the final inspection with A tonight! Yeah!! Hopefully we can close next week and be moved in before Turkey Day. Yeah!! I tried to upload some pictures, but our network is having problems today.

It's snowing out! I just looked out the big window at work, and bygosh, it's snowing!! Which reminds me, I need to add a shovel to my list of things we'll need for the house.

Nose Piercing

I've been contemplating getting my nose pierced for about six months now (save your parental speech and your breath). I've done a lot of research and I know what it entails. I've kept putting it off to see if the urge would go away. It hasn't, it has gotten stronger. I wouldn't get a big bull ring, just a very small stud on my right nostril. I don't want to wake up when I'm fifty and regret not living life. I've seen too many people wake up and wonder what the heck happened. I want the enjoy life, do something unexpected. I am going to talk to my boss about it today. I've even gone as far as to research how to hide the piercing for court. You can buy a very small, clear plug that you can paint the end of it with flesh nail polish. My sister had once thought of getting it done with me, but she wimped out. Maybe I'll do some more research today and finally make a decision.

Feeling Good

As I was driving to work today, listening to Clay Aiken, I had a moment. It came after dealing with some of my personal issues last night after running into an old friend. This friend and I have gone seperate ways and are trying to reconnect, but finding it difficult. I have been struggling with jelousy. She just married someone very wealthy and they just bought a house in a nice part of town and she doesn't work, etc...I discussed my feelings with A last night and he simply stated, "I don't care. We are better for it. We've had to earn our stuff, we're better for it." I thought about it all night and while driving to work this morning and I've realized how lucky I am. I have a secure job, an awesome boss (I am my own boss!), a fabulous family, and I know I am being successful at work. I am feeling much better about myself these days, which is a change for me, so I'm struggling with it. Everything is falling into place and it is very nice.

Emotionally Spent

As I was driving to work today, trying to stay awake, I realized that I am emotionally spent. We went and looked at the house again last night, and changed our offer (to include the repairs of the central air etc...) and T, my father-in-law did a quick inspection. He was rambling off some stuff that needed to be fixed (I expected as much since it was built in the late 50's) and I was getting overwhelmed. I do not speak contractor or construction talk like the rest of my family. After several attempts at asking them to speak English, I gave up. It was C (our agent) that realized my frustration when she saw me curled up in the corner of the dining room, with my glasses in my lap and my head in my hands. She then spoke up and they listened to her and began to explain it in terms that I could understand. I am not as overwhelmed about the house buying thing as I was (we went and had dinner and they explained it to me) but it is still a big step for me. I have never even bought a car, let alone a house. So between the house, work and worrying about mom, I'm spent. Please God, no more. I don't think I can handle anymore. I sometimes wish I wasn't such an emotional person, but darn it all, I am.

Vacation Information

A and I made it to Grand Rapids and back safely this weekend. Our hotel experience was interseting, to say the least. We signed up for the "family fun weekend." With our package we were to get tokens to the game room, and a pizza, breadsticks, and a two-liter of pop. Well, we got there and decided to order our pizza. The pizza place was closed, it had closed earlier that week. We went and told the front desk, they were mortified and embarassed. After calling her manager, the person on duty had us order from another pizza place and they paid for the order. We then discovered that our remote control was broken. Five tries, and four remote controls later, the person on duty was finally able to get our tv working. She kept apologizing, but we were just happy to be away. And the icing on the cake! Our hotel, on Saturday, hosted not only real estate classes, but a swingers halloween party! It was hilarious! All of these drunk people walking around the hotel, in costume. Kind of creepy that it was a swingers party, but it was funny to tell the nuns what was going on in our hotel!

"Get a Little Mud on the Tires"

I have that song by Brad Paisley stuck in my head. I just came back from helping A deliver a port a john and the truck got stuck. Needless to say, A pushed, I drove. A ended up looking like he got pooped on, I stayed dry in the truck.

You Know You've Worked on Your Laptop too Long...

...when you sit down at the desktop in your office and try to hit the touchpad on the keyboard. I've been doing all of my work on my laptop since they were reformatting the desktop in my office. When I sat down at the desktop this morning to do some emails, I tried to hit the touchpad! Yikes, It's been too long without a break! Luckily today is my Friday! I know, it's only Thursday, but I do not have work tomorrow, so technically, it's Friday!

We (A and I) had our first chiropractor appointments last night. Man! I didn't know how messed up my neck was! We did the pro adjuster way of adjusting your back. My neck was the worst that Dr. B has ever seen. Kind of cool, but then again, NOT! He had to work on my neck forever! He said, "No wonder you've been having headaches/migraines! I've never seen a neck this out of whack!" We also had "therapy." They put gel on your worst parts (my shoulders and neck) and with a wand the use electrodes to make your muscles move and loosen up! I didn't realize how bad my neck was till on the way home. I am a little sore today, but they say that is normal. We have a check up next week and then they are putting us on a monthly routine. Our insurance covers 12 visits a year. Heck, I like it already. I feel a foot taller!

Last Night

We spent last evening over at A's house hanging out with Mimy (our two friends nickname). We had dinner and then carved our pumpkins. I manged to go home with everyone's seeds! Yummy! I plan on roasting them tonight!

Meanwhile, inside Carma's sick body...I have discovered that when I get sick with anything my back desides to punish me. Last night my back was so tight that I couldn't sit up straight. I had to take some painkillers just to be able to sleep. A is calling around to some chiropractor's today so hopefully we can go either tonight or tomorrow night before we leave for Grand Rapids.

Daily ramblings

I went to the Dr. Yesterday after work, and guess what? I have the crap back in my lungs again. Since I had "walking pneumonia" my senior year in high school, every year when the weather changes, I get this horrible cough. I have a combination of that cough that burns and hurts and sinus infection. I'm on a Z-Pack. If I don't feel better by Friday I'm supposed to go back in and possibly have chest x-rays. So lets all pray that I feel better, because we cannot afford chest x-rays.

We are carving our pumpkins tonight! Yeah! We are getting together with M and A to eat dinner and carve our pumpkins. I bought a kit at Wal-Mart that has the tools and patterns. I'm mostly excited because I am going to keep all the seeds and roast them. Yummy! While most of the seeds will end up in my belly, I think I can manage to save some for my sister.

I have recently discovered myspace. While I don't have my own myspace, I find it interesting to read what others post. I also think it is funny to see how many people from my high school are on there! A ton of people have kids! It is also interesting to look up my student's pages. Do they not think that people look at this stuff? Who are they trying to impress? Anyways.

I'm getting excited about this weekend. Grand Rapids here we come! I could use a break! I just don't like knowing that I have a ton of laundry to do over the next couple of night so that we have clean clothes to pack! I can't wash any lights or white because our water softener is in the middle of being replaced and we have well water. Hopefully we can get it completely installed tonight!

Feeling Under The Weather

Blech. I do believe this little students of mine have infected me with their germs. I have been feeling icky all weekend. I took the generic type of "NyQuil" last night, but I still didn't sleep well. I managed to drag my butt to work today, since there is no one to cover me. I do have a dr.'s appointment today at 3:30, which means I have to leave work a half an hour early, which means no lunch break. I just want to go home and go back to bed. I wouldn't normally go to the dr., but I feel the ickiness in my throat, and it is time for me to have my annual tonsilitis. Plus, I have to be healthy for this weekend! A andI are going up to Grand Rapids to visit the sister and just get away. We have a wonderful hotel, with an indoor pool! We didn't swim once this summer! I'm thankful that this week is only a four day work week for my anyways. Hopefully this ickiness that I have can be taken care of with a Z pack. I hate the ten day antibiotics because they are ten days and they smell. Anyways. I should find something to do so I look productive when my boss comes back from lunch.

The Rollercoaster Begins Again

Right after I posted the blog about beginning to like the idea of housesitting, BAM, the rollercoaster began again. I got a call from Mrs. V saying that their trip that they would leave for on Monday was cancelled. They are begin to wonder if they will even go for the two years. So now I don't know what we are going to do. I wish they knew so we could know.

Not So Confused

Ok, so I am more calm about the whole situation. We met with Mr. and Mrs. V last night about the housesitting thing. We are going to do it for two weeks while they go over and finalize housing. They leave for the two years in January. We wouldn't be locked in for the full two years, if we find our dream home or something like that, they would find someone else. They are really cool people and I am more at ease now about the whole thing. I think it will be a good time for Ayron and I to have some time alone and save up money. I think this will really be a good thing. We can pay off bills and get ahead finacially and up our credit score and get a better rate for a mortgage. It's been a rollercoaster of emotions, but I think I have finally settled on "This could really be a good thing for us!"

I'm very confused and need advice

We were out looking at houses last night when my sister called me. To make a long story short, someone she goes to church with is being sent to China for two years for his job. They (him and his wife) are looking for someone to possibly housesit for that amount of time. The house is in a very nice part of town. It has a pool and big screen t.v. etc. At first I was really excited about the idea of being able to stay somewhere, virtually rent free (we'd pay utilities) for two years and save up money so we could actually build a house. The more I stayed awake last night thinking, the more I began to not be as excited. I want a house of my own. I want to get on with life. I finally have a "real" job and I'm ready for a house of my own. Sure it would be nice to live with minimal expenses, but two years is a long time! Heck, I haven't even been married two years yet. I'm torn because we have yet to find a house of our own. There is one in Kville that I like, but it needs some cosmetic work. I just don't know. I'm ready for life to begin but am I ready for a house payment? Wouldn't it be odd to live in someone else's home for two years. I don't think I'd ever relax. We are meeting with the couple tonight. I am trying to keep an open mind, but there are so many unknowns. We've never housesat for more than 2 weeks before. There's a big difference between two weeks and two years.

I tried praying about it last night, but it turned more into my mental ramblings. I know God got the point, but I'm sure it was pretty confusing. Is it so wrong to want a house of my own? Is it so wrong to think it would be cool to live in a nice place for two years? Would we become used to that lifestyle and then struggle when it came time to get a place of our own? There are so many questions. Please pray for answers. Hopefully this meeting tonight will answer some questions. I know that some say asking for a sign from God shows a weakness in your faith, but I don't know if I truly believe it. Couldn't asking for a sign be similar to asking for answers to our questions? If so, is it wrong to ask for answers? It's not like I expect God to send down the angel of housing and tell me which to choose, but I would like some guidance. That leads me to another question. How do you know if it's guidance you are getting or if you are being tricked by the devil. And where is J.O. when you need him. Lately he has been a voice of reason and inspiration to me, although I don't think he knows it. We are having a game party at K's house tomorrow night so hopefully he is there and I can pick his brain with all of my religious questions. Any one out there have any advice, thoughts, concerns, a house in the Auburn/Kendalville area we could buy??

So Over House Hunting

I am so over the excitement of house hunting! We put an offer in on a house last night (we toured 5!). The lady that owns the house is out of town taking care of a sick relative in Idaho so we gave her extra time to counter offer. We had a verbal counter offer today from her. She is not budging. To top it all off, the relator that is listing the house was not completly honest with our relator. I don't know what the technical word is, but here is what is happening. Someone already has an accepted offer on that same house. But they have some type of clause that they have to sell two houses of their own first before they can "offically" buy the one we put the offer in on. After/If we get an accepted offer from the home owner, the other people have 48 hours to sell those two houses. If they don't sell those two houses, then the house becomes ours. It's all a big mess. It seems that everytime I get my hopes up about a place, I get slammed back down into reality.

I Have THE BEST Husband

I would just like to say that I have THE BEST husband! Saturday I was suprised with several gifts from my loving and wonderful husband. I was given diamond earings, 20 European roses, and season 2 of Grey's Anatomy. I love that man! The roses are my favorite type too! The baby's breath has glitter. I know it sounds funny, they are my favorite because they have glitter, but I have dried every single flower A has ever given me. I keep some petals in jars, and I have several bunches of roses. I like the glitter baby's breath because it looks really neat when you dry the roses! Oh yeah, and he is a great cook! Last night he cooked chicken in a lime butter sauce, rice, crusty bread (our favorite) for dinner. I cooked a homemade (well the shell was a frozen one and the filling was canned, but I tried) apple pie. I just thought I'd take some time to brag about A because I know I don't do it enough!

My Eyes Are Burning

Ahhhh. So I had my eye appointment about three weeks ago and I found out that I have been wearing my contacts too much. I have the thirty day and night ones, so I have been wearing them for thirty days and nights. My eyes have changed and cannot handle that process, and I have developed some scaring on my left eye. The dr. told me to go one day a week without my contacts. I tried it two weeks ago and got a huge migraine. I thought it was a combination of stress from work, allergies, and my glasses being not the correct prescription. I tried taking my contacts out the other night and it felt like I had sand in my eye. I gave up and put my contacts back in. After giving up several times, I called Greg, my fairy step-mother (long story). So, here is what is happening in my normal language, not the dr. language that was used to describe it to me. My contacts have begun to suffocate my eye. My corneas are not getting the oxygenated blood they need. The sand feeling I was having was oxygenated blood actually getting to where it was supposed to be. So I have to go see Dr. H today and have my eyes looked at. Something was said about steroid drops. Oh..and the best part! I get to get new glasses. Only a dork like me gets excited about getting new glasses. I get new frames and lenses. Yeah!! Wow, I really am a dork!

Strike Two

Well....two swings and two strikes. We just heard back from the couple that we put an offer in on. They refuse to take anything less than what they have it listed at because they need that much money to pay of their mortgage.

It's getting very discouraging. I am beginning to think that we may never find a house. We can only afford so much....just pray for guidance and peace of mind.

First Night on the new Job

So, I manged to offer my services to the night program where I work. They were short handed after two employees left. I decided to offer my services one night a week. Heck, its only three hours more, and the pay is worth it. It's not at much pay as I make during the day program, but it is still extra money. I plan to use this extra money to make one extra house payment a year on our mortgage. I should bring home an extra $180 dollars a month with this extra job. For those of you with excellent math skills, you should be able to figure out how much they are paying me.

Congrat to the Nat (hehe it rhymes!)

A big congrats goes out to my Natty who was offered her job in Grand Rapids yesterday!!! Yeah Natty!!!

Strike One.....

The house we fell in love with in Avilla is way to expensive. The bank won't budge on how much they need to recoop their loses. We went house shopping yesterday and we found another house. I have decided not to get my hopes up by telling people where it is, how much we offered, etc. The family has until 6 tonight to counter offer/accept. Just pray that we find the right house for us.

Happy Day!!

I was given a second student today! It's a refershing change of pace to have a motivated student who works, and works hard! Student #2 even worked through lunch. I had to beg him to take a break so I could catch up on grading his stuff and figure out what to assign him next! Student #1 is still frustrating, but Student #2 makes up for it.

We put an offer in on the house in Avilla last night. The bank has until Thursday to counter offer. Keep your fingers crossed!

We found it

We found a house! It needs some work, but it is very doable work, considering the family I moved into. The previous owners, closed off the garage to make a room. They drywalled a wall into the garage, but never took out the garage door. We wouldn't not need that extra room, so the first thing that should be done is making the garage, a garage again. They added a 4 seasons room off of the dining room. The 4 seasons room has an inside flower bed that runs along 2 of the walls. That would go, and we would poor cement out to the walls to make a true 4 seasons room. The previous owners also had mirrors everywhere. I'm not kidding, EVERYWHERE. Either they were really vain or they had some weird parties in that place. It is a bank repo, and they are asking way more than it's worth. Our realtor knows we can low ball them and the bank would probably take it. T, my father in-law and our inspector, is typing a list of things that "need" to be done to attach to our offer as proof of why they are asking too much. The people also kind of over did the landscaping, and since no one has been living there, it has grown! I would probably do a little yard work this fall, but then let winter kill things off and then start new in the spring. I would really love to have this house, but I'm trying not to get our hopes up.

Another house we looked at last night proves that God has a sense of humor. I know that it shows a weakness in your faith to ask for a sign from God, but I have been wanting to have some sort of calmness or something when I walk into a house(ps: I had that in the house we want to buy). The second house we looked at, smelled like diapers (they have set of triplets and a younger boy). While noticing everything that needs to be done to even make the house truly livable, my mother in law started laughing. She called me into the triplets room and said, "Sweetie, this is your sign. I don't know if God is telling you to buy it or run the other way though!" Two of the triplets have the exact same names as my mom and aunt! The third triplets name is the name of a friend of mine (we have lost contact over the past year, but we are working on building our relationship back up).

Well, it's Friday, and I have court on Monday so I should get all of my paper work in line.

House Hunting Continues...

but with much less worries than before. We found out from our mortgage officer (the officer title cracks me up!) yesterday that we are preapproved for a house. Tonight we are going with our relator to look at 3 houses. We are taking my in-laws along with us. T, my father in-law, is a licensed home inspector so he can help up realize what we are getting into. The one house we really like has accepted a bid, pending financing. If we like the house, we can also put in an offer and if the first couple's offer falls through (can't get the money) then it's ours. The second house is kind of scary. No...scary's not the right word...funny....because it is set up almost exactly like mom's house! So, it would kind of be like moving back in at home! Except one room is painted this obnoxious pink with green carpet (I know this because A and I went and peeked in the windows last night). Both of the houses are currently vaccant, so if we pick one of those houses, it wouldn't be long till we could move in...which is a scary thought in itself. I was "taiking" via email to an old friend ("old" meaning we've been friends for a long time) today and he said that out in Seattle his friends just bought a house for $300,000. I cannot imagine paying that much money. We aren't even going to spend a third of that amount. I'm trying not to get my hopes up....they say that the hard part is over with since we have the financing, but I think the hard part has just begun! Now I want to look at every house in our price range so I'm not left thinking..."I wonder what that house looked like."

Weird Wednesday

Its "hump" day and I feel weird. Not sick weird, just weird. I'm really tired, which I shouldn't be since I slept 9 hours last night. Hmm? Maybe I'm worried. We had our meeting with our mortgage officer last night. Things went well. Our credit scores were where we thought they'd be. She is sending in our application today. Hopefully by Friday we will know what we are preapproved for. It would be nice to know now, but patience in a virtue (that I apparently lack!). There is good news though, my sisters interview in GR went well yesterday and she stayed the night and had a second interview this morning. Hopefully all is well.

I really don't feel like being at work today. This is the first time I've felt this way. Not that I don't like the place, I'm just not up to par today and I don't feel like I can be effective. I feel like I will easily snap today and that is not what M needs today (after being sick two days). Well, speaking of M, he just walked in...so time to work....

Keep us in your prayers about the house and about N's job!

Proof that idiots live among us

This was emailed to me by A. Being a teacher, he thought I would find it funny. While I find it funny, I also find it sad. How stupid have we become??

Another Bad Week...

...in my town's life. Fair week. Apparently this year is the 75th DeKalb County Free Fall Fair. Yeah rah!! While the ACD week brings in a lot of people to our town, those people have money, and spend it on classic cars and collectible items. The people that come to our town during the fair week...well...are scuzy. It's like this is the one week a year when all of the freaks from the tri-state area feel comfortable enough to venture out of their houses and travel to the courthouse square. Not to mention those wonderful people that "Poor Jack" hires to "run" (I put it in quotes because they don't really work, they just take ticket and smoke) the rides. There are good things about the fair. Funnel cakes, elephant ears, the 4-H side of the whole thing. But the biggest kicker is the slogan. "The biggest family reunion!" I call it the biggest gathering of freaks. Unfortunately, I am going up there tonight. It will be crazy since it is the opening night of the fair. I am going to "work" the TR booth with my husband. Who knows, maybe I'll meet some interesting people...yeah right!

It's Finally Friday...

...I'm free at last. Well, not really. I'm stuck here until 3:30. Which isn't bad, except my vision is screwed up! I had my first eye exam in about 2 years. They did a glaucoma test which required funny yellow eye drops, then they dilated my pupils, but sucked. Everything was red! I was given one of those nifty pair of sunglasses (even though it's raining and the sun hasn't woken up yet) that covers your entire face that only old people wear (sorry mom, but it's true). My vision is still a bit blurry. I look like I'm on drugs! 5 more hours and I can go home and take a nap!

Since when...

...has it been ok to go 3 days without showering when you smell? Since when has it been ok to not wear deodorant, wear a long sleeved shirt, and work out? Since when has it become ok to work out on your lunch break and not shower before coming back to work? I just wondered if I missed the memo on the new changes in social etiquette. If I did, please someone let me know that it's ok to go out into public smelling horrible and wearing last nights eye goobers on the side of my face. Oh..that reminds me, I have an eye appointment tomorrow morning.

Today is the day for change

Ahhh, I love mornings. Well, not actually. Lately I have become more like my sister in wanting to say in bed till noon. After yesterday though, there is no where to go but up!! Yesterday was a tough day at work, student and teacher both didn't feel well and both were easily aggravated by each other. Today is much better. Yeah!

Today is also the day that A and I are meeting with the realtor to look at houses. I can't wait! She was able to work it so that we can go look at all 4 houses we found tonite! I know they say not to look at more than 3 houses, but our realtor is very busy and we were lucky to snag her. Granted we pulled the whole family card (she's married into A's mom's side of the family), but still. So I'm very excited. I have brought my digital camera and am ready to explore!!

Well, I better find something productive to do today!!!

Happy day! Today is pay day!! Well, I won't get the check today, they mail it, but still. My first real paycheck from my first real adult job.

Today is going to be good, I know it.

Big Decisions

Well, A and I have decided to meet with a realtor to discuss our options. It's frightening and exciting at the same time. I've never made a big purchase like a house before! I've never even bought a car before. We have a couple of houses we want to look at, but it's not like we are going to buy one right off the bat. Hopefully we can find some incentives since we are first time home buyers, I'm a government employee and I'm also a licensed teacher.

I really feel yucky again today. This makes day 3 in a row for me. My tummy does weird flip flops and then I get a stabbing pain right behind one of my incision marks from my surgery. A's tummy hasn't been well either. I don't think it's something we ate, because after three days I'd think we'd be over it. Either way, it's going to make for a long day!

Wedding Woes Part II

So, we went to the wedding and to our suprise, it went very well. A friend that was in our wedding and recently moved to Arizona came back. It was really nice to see him and hear about his life out west. Ran into some long lost, but not forgotten, friends. E ended up sitting with us at the reception and them coming back to our house for drinks. It was really cool to get reconnected with her. The bride and groom where happy to see us and it seems that the invitation was her way of apologizing and i accepted. While I'm sad that we lost 6 months of our friendship, it is cool to know that it's not all lost.

Work is still going well. My one student worked very hard today and with minimal help from myself of T. Biology seems to be his strong subject. He spent his lunch break showing T how to play computer/internet games. It was funny to watch the student get frustrated with teaching an older adult new technology. I spent the day making business cards, checking about ISTEP, getting late work around, typing letters to schools, and fighting with my laptop. I can't get my wireless to work even though my house (where I work is a house) is wireless ready. Hmm... I told student if he gets homework done tonight, I'd let him take a crack at the wireless problem in the morning. He is a computer whiz and is looking foward to teaching me a thing or two.

Well, it's time to go do the final paperwork of the day. With all of the forms I fill out, I wonder how much of it is useful? How much do they refer back to the daily log sheets? I know they come in handy, and I'm not complaining, I'm just wondering where do they store all of this paperwork? Why not computerize it!?

In Over My Head

After my meeting with 2 out of the 4 schools I'll be working with, one song keeps running through my head. More specifically, part of one song.

"Everyone knows I'm in over my head, over my head...." Cable Car by The Fray


Just when I think we are on the right track and everything is all ironed out, SMACK, someone asked a question I had no clue how to answer. The main concern being credits. I am licensed English teacher, therefore I can legally give English credits. I have three years to become a "Highly Qualified Teacher" (meaning I can teach all subjects in an alternative setting, like the one I'm currently in). So until I reach the end of that three years, am I allowed to give credits in other areas? Do I need to work directly with a teacher from one of the schools who is licensed in the core areas?

Hopefully this can of "Mountain Lightning" (cheap Mt. Dew) and my beef pot pie will help me sort all of this out....

Wedding Woes

So I have a wedding to attend this weekend. I am not really looking forward to it. The person getting married used to be a friend of mine. We basically grew up together. After my wedding we drifted apart, I was student teaching, she was planning her own wedding. I didn't think it would be a big deal since we both were busy. WRONG! She called me one day, out of the blue, and basically called our friendship off. I know at times she can be a bit childish, so I thought I'd wait the storm out. It seems I'm still waiting the storm out. After a couple of phone calls (she didn't answer, but I left voice mails) and unreplied emails, I took a hint. Then, WHAM. The wedding invitation shows up. I don't know how to take the invitation. Is this her way of finally putting the ball back in my court? Is she waiting for me to make a move? Is this her response to my phone calls and emails? Did she only send it because her mother quilted her into it? It's all very strange. It would be easier if I knew why the invitation was sent. If I knew that she sent it as a gesture in my direction, then great. If she sent it because "mommy said so" then I don't want to make her uncomfortable at her own wedding. We are still friends with everyone in her family, just not her. I'd love to strike a friendship back up again, but then I don't know if I can deal with anymore of these tangents she has twice a year. I bowed out of being a bridesmaid, which is what really adds the icing to the cake about this whole thing. I am kind of happy that I can prove her mom wrong. Back in the day, while helping her pick out bridesmaid dresses, her mom told her to make sure the style she liked had a maternity version. She thought I'd be pregnant by the time the wedding came around. Well, guess what I'M NOT! Yeah, at least I won that bet!

Well, I needed to get this off my mind before my big meeting this morning (in twenty minutes). Hopefully all goes well at this meeting and I can come back to the house and get out of these clothes. Yes, I dressed up for the meeting. Dress pants, sweater style cami, and a red dress shirt. Oh yeah, with pointy toed, high healed shoes that click when I walk through the house. I call them my teacher shoes. You can hear me walking down the hall. Better get my feet walking so I'm not late.

Teacher Moment

I am trying to figure out how I want to balance this program. I would love to have this computer program I went to training for, but the money is an issue. I'm working on a grant (well, going to work on it this afternoon) but if that falls through the students will only have books. Not everyone works/learns well with just books, then again, same thing with computers. I once worked at a place where they pushed technology on students. It was pathetic. The students couldn't use encyclopedias. I cannot use the Dewy Decimal System (shut up librarian nun natty) but how many places still use that? Grrr... I have a feeling that these things will work themselves out within the next week, if not after my meeting Thursday morning. I want text books and computer programs. Is that too much to ask?

Don't Try This At Home

I have discovered something that I probably could never do again, and even if I could, I'd choose not to. I am sitting at the computer, sending out emails to people begging for money for this computer program, eating my morning snack of peanut butter M&M's when I sneezed. Did you know that you can sneeze M&M's out your nose? While what came out wasn't a whole M&M, but rather large piece, it still hurt!

Yet another day at work

It was a struggle to get myself out of bed and to work today. I have had some major migraine issues the past couple of weeks and waking up with a headache just ruins the whole day. The fog delay didn't help anything either. I wasn't delayed, but I was hoping for a cancellation, and then had to face the disappointment of it not happening. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my job, but all I want to do when I have one of these headaches is climb back into bed. It didn't help that my hubby has the day off and slept in. Heck, before I even left for work I managed to eat breakfast, shower, clean up the guest bedroom, do two loads of laundry, minor scrapbooking, and make my hubby's "To Do" List. Don't go thinking that I'm a bad wife who won't let her husband enjoy the day off. We have paperwork that needs to be sent back into the car insurance people by today and I didn't want him to forget to fax it. He has to take the company truck to the Auburn store today to be looked at, so knowing him, he'll get suckered into working and I'll go home and do the "To Do" List myself.

Oh my, that couch in my office is looking good right about now. If only I had a pillow........

I am my own boss.......YIKES

Work has really taken off, if only we had some students! I had an improptu meeting with my "boss" yesterday and if you were to read the Reader's Digest version of our 3 minute conversation (he's not a big talker) it would come down to this..."We(the schools and probation department) like what you have in mind and we are handing this program over to you. Whatever you feel you need to do or want to do, then by all means do it." So this thing is 100% mine. It's cool, yet scary! I have a meeting with some officials from a couple of the schools on Thursday, so after that I'll have a better feel for how this is all going to play out. I ran into a gentleman that I worked under while student teaching and he let it slip that Friday is the official last day of state counting (for funding purposes) so I'm hoping next week some of these students will get themselves kicked out. Wait, is that wrong of me? To wish that students get in trouble so that I can have something to do? Well I better get started with this grant writing business if I want to get enough money for a program that I want.

Labor Day Party

Most people spend the Labor Day weekend taking "one last trip" for the summer. We spent it at home since we were broke. We did go to the craft show, which sucked this year. We had a get together Monday night at a friends apartment. The upstairs apartment seems big until you try to pack 12 people in the small living room. Ayron was put in charge of grilling and he almost caught the deck on fire. The grill leg collapsed, and most of the brats when flying over the edge of the deck into the potted plants owned by the renters down below. Opps.... We then had the bright idea to play Scattagories. The Letter "N," the topic "Things that jump/bounce." The most creative response, "Nudests!"

They Let Me Graduate With Honors??

I'm realizing and reliving the whole saying of "If you don't use it, you lose it." I am practicing my math skills (i may have to take the Praxis in math to be considered a "highly qualified teacher") by taking the practice ISTEP+ GQE exam. We have a huge book here at work, and I thought, what the heck, might as well start practicing now. I am beginning to think that I slept through most of middle school and all of high school math! The only things I can remember is stuff I relearned by working as an aide last spring. Estimating square roots? Blech...am I that bored that I willingly decided to prove to myself how lacking I am in the math department?

I am looking forward to tonight. J and K are getting married. It's nice to see him finally happy. Yes he dated my best friend in high school. Yes they got married, then divorced...long bad story. But it's nice to see him this happy. They are having a family only wedding then a big party at his house this evening. I'm excited. I'm gonna use it as an opportunity to get all dressed up and girlyfied. Well, this stupid practice exam won't take itself so I better get back to work.

Bored..so I did another "survey"

A to Z about Me!

A - Age: 23

B - Band listening to right now: The Fray, Jars of Clay, Joss Stone

C - Career: Education

D - Drink or smoke: I have never smoked. Never even actually touched a cigarette that was outside of the box/carton (i used to work in a grocery store). I drink occassionally. Get 3 winecoolers in me.....whew

E - Easiest person/s to talk to: Ayron and/or Dawn lately my sister and I have been talking too

F - Favorite song/s at the moment: "Life is a Highway" by Rascal Flatts

G - Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: Gummy bears soaked in vodka at the bottom of a jello shot. Oh wait, I just wrote that I don't drink. Ok, so there are exceptions, mainly my dads halloween party (carrie and michelle make great jello shots)

J - Junk foods you like: oreos and twizzlers

L - Longest car ride ever: one to florida when I was like 3....um...Oklahoma with Ayron

M - My favorite Sport/s: soccer

N - Number of relationships you've had: 2

O - One wish you have: to have a happy life by my standards and no one elses

P - Phobias: Being left alone.

Q - Favorite Quote: "Statistically, those who eat their own buggers are healthier than the rest of us." J.O. or "That zebras got BALLS!" ME

R - Reason to smile: my three nieces

S- Song: Isn't this a repeat of "F"

T- Time you woke up: woke up and offically got out of bed are two different times for me

U - Unknown fact about you: i secretly long to tour with a musical. RENT! Ahh that would be awesome

V - Vegetable/fruit you hate: squash, but pinapple makes me break out in hives

W - Worst habit: i tend to over worry

X - X-rays you've had: ankle, knees. Had nuclear testing and ultrasounds on my gallbladder

Y- Yummy food/s: My dad's pancakes (ayron's getting really close at making them)

Z- Zodiac sign: i'm on the cusp. sometimes cancer sometimes leo

Let the circus begin

For those of you who have had the "honor" of visiting my hometown during Labor Day weekend, you already know what I'm going to rant about. This weekend is the BIG fall car auction out the the K Auction Park. Ok, big deal you say. My relatively small town (to me it's small) has slowly become the place for crazy, stupid, bad driving, rich idiots to congregate this week. Today is the start of the auction, so our town is pack and just plain crazy. Here's proof of these peoples craziness. While in high school I worked at a grocery store. Over labor day weekend we had some rich big wig from Texas come into the store, throw a fit that we didn't carry "his" brand of gum. Once he finally decided on a pack of .60 cent gum, he paid with a hundred dollar bill. Sometimes I begin to wonder if this weekend is worse than fair week. Yes, the fair has creepy carne guys and all of the redneck freaks from the surrounding counties show up, but at least the blocks around the courthouse are the only crazy ones. This weekend, the whole town goes crazy. It's like people forget how to drive. Oh, and the restaurants are packed. Which brings me to my next point (wow, this blog is really ADD isn't it).

Ayron's birthday is tomorrow (he'll be 25). I thought about trying to get everyone together this weekend at a restaurant for a nice family meal, but since all of those crazies have come to town to trade their "collector cars" (see note below) you can't even get a reservation in Ft. W. Blech, we were going to try to get out of town this weekend, but our checking account won't allow us, so I guess it's another Labor Day weekend stuck in town. At least we don't have to park cars for any athletic events anymore.


Note Below: While driving north on the interstate yesterday I saw a frightening, yet hilarious sight. A beat up old truck was pulling a trailer full of golf carts and cars. Granted, this is not an uncommon site in my area around this time of the year, but here is the uncommon part. He was pulling the Flintstonemobile. The one from the movie! A beat up old truck full of rust holes was towing this huge purplish car. It was hilarious. Ok, so maybe you had to see it, but it was a funny sight for me to see!

New Job

I started my new job today. I'm going to quite my part time deal with the golf course, its not worth the money and the constantly being screwed over by the schedule. So, back to my new job...

T, a fellow employee who is there to help me, and I spent the day observing the alternative school. We are responsible for creating and teaching a program for students who have been expelled or suspended from 3 public districts and/or the alternative school. We are starting this program from scratch with the probation department and the school districts. Its kind of cool to know that I will have helped create this program and get it off the ground. I am excited, but nervous. We are starting with virtually nothing. If anyone knows of any place I can get gently used materials of any kind for free or cheap (our budget is based on grants) let me know by emailing me at yipteacher@yahoo.com Anything we can get our hands on at this point would be greatly appreciated.

Freak at Night

Last night Ayron and I were watching the news in bed and we heard a banging noise. We realized it was coming from the door by our bedroom. Keep in mind we don't use this door, and it soon will be taken out and walled up. I have crap piled in front of the door and we just basically use the little entryway as storage for now. So anyways. I start freaking out and hide under the covers, juvenile, I know, but come one. Ayron gets up, grabs a hunting knife from his closet and goes out into the hallway. He threw me the phone and then yelled, "What do you want." Some guy yells back, "The police told me to come here to get my car from FC towing." Ayron yells back (all of this yelling is because he didn't open the door) "That business hasn't been based here for years and we don't have your car." The guy then swears the cops told him to come here, and if that guy doesn't live here, then where does he live. Ayron finally convinces the guy we don't run a towing company and to get lost. The guy runs the sidewalk that runs across the front of our house and then takes off on foot back into town. Ayron called the police to inform them of the situation and that the guy was on foot and that we wanted to make sure he was off our property. Here's what is odd. We live in the "country" on a road that is dangerous enough to drive during the day, let alone walk at night in a black sweatshirt. Why did the guy come looking for his car at 11 at night? Why did he decide to bang on the door that is hidden by plants and a decorative chair? Why not go for the door by the driveway with the doorbell? The cops managed to pick him up and take him back into town, but the whole thing still kind of creeps me out...

THings are looking up...

Well, I had my interview with SYIP on Friday morning and that went very well. They called and wanted more information from me to run a background check, then they called this weekend wanting another phone number for one of my refrences. I started to think, I've never actually had an employer call one of my references. Hmm...Anywhoose...The way I look at it, they wouldn't be going to all of this trouble if they weren't seriously looking at me as a canadate, right? Ayron is loving his new position as Manager and we are starting to look at houses halfway between his job and my possible job. I'm trying not to get too excited or count the chickens before they hatch, but it is exciting.

Theory on God

I am a firm believer that God has a sense of humor, I am beginning to think that he is just as sarcastic as me. Here is a more "scientific" form of explanation.


Hypothesis: God has a sense of humor and although we may not realize why or even if his "jokes" are funny at first, in the future they are almost always made clear.

Testing: I applied at several local schools and heard nothing. I decided to just start applying everywhere. One week after I commit to my new "We'll go where the Lord takes us" mentality, Ayron becomes manager at the Kendallville store. After basking in my excitement for a mere two hours, God decides to show his sarcasm. I received a phone call from K High School. They wish to interview me for a high school teaching position. Very freaking funny Lord. After a couple minutes of consideration and talking to all three moms (lynette, joellen, and janette) I called Vice Prnc. H and left this voice mail: "While I am flattered to even be considered a worthy applicant to interview it pains me to admit that in the past week my situation has changed and I will not be able schedule an interview with you. While I hate to turn down an interview and/or possibly a job, I am no longer able to move. I thank you for your consideration of me as an applicant, but at this time I am not able to interview with K schools."

Scientific Conclusion: God is not only humorous, but sarcastic. I am hoping that this is a sign of better things to come. I still have my interview next Friday. I am hoping that this all works out, and I'm sure that it will but.....I guess I'm afraid that I won't have a job in September and I'll be kicking myself for not even going for an interview. Ayron is finally happy at work and that makes me happy. He sacrificed a year of his life so I could finish school and for that I am extremely grateful. So do I consider this a sacrifice for him? I really don't want to move, and I am not regretting my decision about K, I guess I just want other schools to call. I don't want to be left wondering, "What if they were the only school that called." I know that most schools, although I don't understand their reasoning, do a lot of hiring two weeks before school. Hopefully this thing in Steuben county works out and we call all live happily ever after. I guess I just don't know what exactly to think about the whole thing. I don't have a big pit in my stomach like I just turned down the opportunity of a life time so for now I truly believe I have done the right thing. If only the other schools would call...

Life Is Beginning

Today is a FABULOUS day! Ok, so its raining, and humid, and freakin hot, but it is beautiful. I went into work this morning, though I don't know why (it was storming badly), and I was blessed with a phone call. Ayron had his second interview this morning and he is now the manager at the Kendallville T R. This is a blessing! He has some big ideas for the store and he was able to impress the owner. We talked breifly on my drive home from work (no reason to stay if there are no golfers brave enough to golf in lightening) and we both said it feels like life is finally beginning. Yes, I'm 23 and he is soon tobe 25, but if feels like things are finally falling into place. Dad said that there are moments when that happens, but it won't always be that way. I am enough of a realist to know that, but I am having fun enjoying the day off. I think I will go home and bake Ayron some goodies and scrapbook.


PS: Thank You God for this blessing. I also ask that you bless me in this next week so that I am able to properly prepare for my interview at SYIP next Friday and bless me with a new job as well. Thanks. Love, Carmie

Mastercard Ad

Dawn Dish Detergent.......$1.75
Baking Soda.....................$.75
Hydrogen Peroxide...........$.33
Left Over Puppy Shampoo...$1.00

Deskunking a friend's seeing eye dog......priceless

Updated Version

Dawn Dish Detergent.....$1.75
Baking Soda....................$. 75
Hydrogen Peroxide..........$.33
Left Over Puppy Shampoo...$1.00
Trip to Professional Groomer after two tries in the front yard.....$35.00
Deskunking a stinky dog.....priceless

ps: the professional trip included nails being clipped, ears cleaning and a specail deskunking bath.

Cute Find

I found this while "stumble"ing with Firefox. I believe it fits my current mentalitiy.

My Resignation

Entertaining Website

My sister has recently discovered the "stumble" button that Mozilla Firefox has available. While "surfing" the internet yesterday, we found the funniest site. Yes, by some it may be viewed as "just wrong" or "evil." It is rather amusing, in a sick and twisted way. It is called Bubble Girl.

Try it out, I bet you'll be amazed, or atleast mildly entertained.

I Finally Have A Nephew

I have been blessed with four beautiful nieces, McKenna, Madison, Marisa, and Nina(a little bit hairy compared to the others) but I can say that I now have a nephew. My nephew is about 2 1/2 feet tall and probably well over 40 pounds. He likes to drool and he is blessed in the hair department. His name is Brutus. My brother-in-law got my sister-in-law a puppy for her birthday. Making sure that he wouldn't be the only guy in the house, the only stipulation was that the puppy be a boy. Brutus will come home tomorrow. They have spent the week puppy proofing the house. I am questioning their decision to make the dog an indoor dog. I have nothing against indoor dogs, but when they will grow to be bigger than the humans in the house, decisions need to be rethunk. Brutus is a full blooded St. Bernard. My little niece can walk under the mom's belly without even touching her belly, and the dad was bigger than that. As my father-in-law says, "An indoor dog?! Have you ever seen a cow poop in the living room?" If nothing else, this should prove to be entertaining!

Are the doors open or is it me?

I couldn't sleep last night and for some reason I kept replaying a conversation I had with JO at The Gathering (our Bible Study) some weeks ago. We were talking about how God does open doors but he won't physically pick you up and guide you through them. You have to be willing to meet God in the middle. He'll open the door, but you need to do stuff to prove to God the door needs to be open and then make the effort to walk through the door. So back to why I wasn't able to sleep last night...

I am getting frustrated about not finding a job. Yes I work at the country club, but that doesn't really help pay the bills. I feel like I have done a ton to get a job in the education field, but I feel like I'm stuck in a room with an unopened door and no windows to crawl through. Then I begin to wonder, is the door slightly opened and I'm just not tugging on the handle enough? But then, how much do I tug? Do I tug so hard I pull the door off the hinges? Or do I wait until the door is opened some more by some divine force?

I'm pretty sure this whole thing is yet another lesson in patience from the big guy upstairs. I guess I just need to keep trying.

Blech

Well, after being told that I had yesterday off because they triple schedueled people, Ayron and I spent the day farting around in Fort Wayne. I did manage to go to the unemployment office first and apply for unemployment since I am not going back to G middle school in the fall. So I think I have done all of the menial steps to qualify for unemployment until I find a job.

I am not looking forward to tonight. I work 3-Close which isn't normally bad, but tonight will be busy because we are having an open house for a guy that works for us since his wife died. So that goes until 9, which means I can't really start cleaning till like 9:30 which means I wont get home till close to eleven, and then I have to be back to work at 7 on Saturday morning. I work saturday till 2, then come home and crash. Blech. So much for a relaxing birthday weekend.

The Mind Readers at the Credit Card Companies

I believe that Credit Card Companies employ mind readers. I had begun to attempt to set up a payment plan (just with myself) to get myself out of debt with Visa. I hadn't used the card in forever and had been paying as much as possible. So I came to mom's house today and grabbed my mail and thought it was my receipt for paying my bill over the phone. For giggles I opened the letter to find out that they upped my credit limit. Now, I am smart enough to realize that just because they have upped my limit does not mean I can pull it out of the dresser drawer and spend any money, but its just hilarious.

Down But Not Out

Trying to decide what to do with your life is a difficult decision, add in another life and the difficulty level sky rockets. Ayron has finally convinced me (along with my sister) to just start applying everywhere. So as soon as I apply for three in Plainfield Indiana this wonderful opportunity has begun to take shape for Ayron at work. While that is not 100% yet, it is still something he is exteremly excited about but he is hesitant to go ahead in the off chance I get a job somewhere else. I received a letter in the mail yesterday from my "job" at G Middle School that informed me that my position is not available next year. While that is dissapointing, I take it as a sign from God that I don't need to be there because of the stress Mr. M puts on everyone. Now as for the "Not Out" part.

I have applied for several jobs at DeKalb, Plainfield, and one that I'm particularly interested in in Steuben county. The Steuben County Youth Improvement Program is looking to hire a part time teacher at an unbelivable hourly rate (I could make more than a first year teacher in a traditional setting). That position would be really cool because as much as anyone wants a traditional classroom right off the bat I don't know if that is what I really want. Yes, if the opportunity comes along sign me up, but I think it would be cool to teach in a nontradtional setting.

Pray for guidance for Ayron and I.

Oh yea, I turn 23 on the 23rd!! We are going to go golfing. Yes, me, golfing. I went for the first time last sunday (yes, I work there, I just don't participate) with Ayron, Phil and Nikki. I had a ton of fun, I sucked, but I had a ton of fun! So for our (Nikki and My) birthdays we are going to try the back nine. We spent 3 1/2 hours doing the first nine at Garrett Country Club. I suck so I don't think I'll be volunteering to go with Dad anytime soon, but at least I'm trying!

Local Firefighter Is Now Famous

I personally know this guy and here are some interesting facts to keep in mind before reading the article.

1.) This man is a volunteer figherfighter that works under the direction of my brother in law.

2.) This man in deathly afraid of heights (attic fires are not his thing)

3.) He is easily influenced by peer pressure: I asked him if he would take a whole packet of pop rocks in his mouth along with half a can of coke. He then decided that since nothing was happening he would shake his head. When the "explosion" happened he kept his mouth shut and let the lava pour out his nose!!

4.) I know his comments were edited for the newspaper. Jeff would never say "..some scary crap." Jeff, when talking to his buddies would say, "Man that was some F.....ing scary s.......!"

Probably the only fame he'll ever get, but its still funny to open the paper and read about the guy you can influence to do just about anything!!

Local Firefighter